@forteller Hi. Welcome to the party! o/
My best educated guesses:
1.) Sometimes the queue clogs. Time solves this. Connections also need to be established among different nodes, and I think this may impact your TL. If other users on your instance are not connected to any users on others, it might not show anything. Also, other instances could be blacklisted. Depends on instance's policy.
@forteller
2.) Not sure what the current status of that is, but think it should be possible. Basically uses OStatus.