request for communication advice Show more
my housemate and I decided on a Thing without informing our third housemate
we just told her about this
she didn't immediately respond but she's definitely upset
we have to apologise, obviously
not sure what else we should do
@verity 1) Apologize for not including her in the decision, not for the decision. It doesn't matter whether the decision was right or wrong.
2) The three of you should make a plan for decision-making on things that impact the household so all have a chance to be included, then stick to it.
3) Test that process by using it to revisit original decision with the input of all.
@verity It would probably also help to let her know that her exclusion from the original decision process was a failure of planning/communication/whatever rather than out of malice. She may not know if you really value her opinions/needs right now.
@HedgeMage hm, that's a thought - thank you for chiming in!
this will take some tact and care, though I really want to address it as soon as possible